I turned 40 this past June! I also like to self-reflect and share my thoughts on life lessons that I have gone through or learned. And turning a milestone birthday seems like the perfect time to reflect on 40 life lessons for turning 40! Here are my life tips, quotes, lessons, and how-to’s that I have grown through.

40 Life Lessons at 40

1. Wear sunscreen and wear a hat in the sun. Wash and moisturize your face at night. Your future aging face will thank you later!
2. Clean the kitchen as a family right after dinner, and run the dishwasher if it’s 3/4 full. When you walk in the kitchen the next morning, and NOT see a sink full of dishes to do, it’s honestly the BEST feeling for a mom.
3. If you are in a conflict with someone, ask yourself this question: “What did I do to allow this outcome to happen?” Hard question to sit in. But a powerful answer will reveal itself if you do.
4. Setting a goal is the easy part. Taking ACTION on the goal is the hard part. 92% of people don’t achieve their goals due to lack of planning and writing them down. NINETY-TWO PERCENT!!!!
5. If you think you need to go to therapy, just go. The sooner you start working on your “stuff”, the sooner you can feel better inside yourself. When you feel better, it affects how you interact and treat everyone around you.
6. No one is thinking about you as much as we think they are. They are thinking about themselves. So quit worrying about what everyone else might think.
7. Say no to people and things that you don’t really want to do. Why would YOU suffer through something that doesn’t align with your mindest, goals, core values, etc just to please someone else??
8. Drink your water!! It benefits your body inside and out.
9. Do not start your day on someone else’s agenda. Ahem. Answering emails as soon as you wake up. Do something for yourself first. Even just 5 minutes. Need help? (A word puzzle, walk the dogs, sit in a quiet space and drink your coffee, exercise, meditate, plan your day if that reduces your anxiety.)
10. If you want your kids to believe in themselves as adults, then you HAVE to go first and believe in yourself! Teach them to believe in their dreams, by showing them that YOU BELIEVE IN YOURS.
11. If you aren’t sure if someone is right for your life, pay attention to how you feel after an encounter with them. Any shame, guilt, mental draining, negativity, etc that YOU feel after, is a sign that they aren’t the right fit for you, and a boundary has to go up.
12. Text your friends randomly that you love them.
13. Never turn down a hug from a child. You never know how much they need one.
14. Read books. Any kind of book to expand your knowledge base.
15. Jumping off a cliff is brave. So is deciding not to. Trust your gut when it tells you something is or is not for you. That is the ultimate bravery.
16. Learn any new skill! Challenge yourself, grow, and connect with new people. Need ideas? Comment on this blog, and I’ll give you some!
17. People stay in their comfort zone to stay feeling safe. Even if they are unhappy!! Take any small step to challenge your comfort zone, because it leads to fulfillment.
18. Self-care is not selfish!! Self-care can look like 5 minutes of sitting on the front porch. It can also look like a bubble bath. It can also be a full night’s rest. It can be waking up early to a cleaned kitchen and drinking coffee alone. It can be a word puzzle. It can be reading a book for 15 minutes. There are NO EXCUSES why a woman can’t find 5 minutes to do something for herself before she is of service to others (partners, kids, pets, work, etc.)
19. Cook your favorite meal even if no one else likes it every now and then.
20. If you have trouble focusing or procrastinating, set a 20-minute timer and just go!! Or, make a task list or time block your day- whatever works for you. (I like timers and lists.)
21. If you’re curious about an idea, follow it. See where it leads you and how you grow. If it goes nowhere, now you know! Follow the next idea. Over time, you will find “your thing.”
22. If you want to make friends, be the scared one and go first. Ask someone to meet up, go to an activity in your area of interest, or ask a friend to set you up with another friend- especially if you have moved to a new area and know no one! It’s all scary, but you will find someone that you can connect with.
23. Travel to one of your bucket list destinations if you can. Don’t wait for “someday.”
24. Learn how to budget your money! Teach your kids how money works (and how it doesn’t.)
25. Say please and thank you. Manners matter y’all.
26. Not knowing how to do something is not an excuse to stay stuck. Google it.
27. “If you know better, than do better.” -Maya Angelou
28. Support your friends and their dreams. You’ll need someone to believe in yours one day. They will remember if you clapped for them or not.
29. What someone says about you behind your back is none of your business. You aren’t looking backward, so leave them behind you.
30. Pay attention to your triggers. In parenting, in relationships, in friendships, in work, in yourself. Every trigger I have come across is something I need to work on to heal. (Parenting is my biggest wake-up call on those triggers.)
31. You really are the 5 people you hang out with. Either in growth or stagnancy.
32. Learn what your limiting beliefs are. What stories are running in the back of your mind to keep you stuck? Acknowledge, and then re-write the story. Spoiler alert- the story usually stems from someone else from our childhood. Don’t let that past version of someone else’s scarcity keep you from being who you’re meant to be.
33. Reframe your failures as lessons you had to learn. The only true failure is not spending time to learn from your actions and then behaving differently.
34. You’re not always the hero in someone else’s story. That is ok.
35. Grief is a journey. It never goes away. Carry it in your heart alongside the love you felt for that person. Share their stories and their lessons. That is how you keep them with you.
36. Take the trip. Don’t wait until one day when. Tomorrow is never promised. Make a memory now.
37. Determine your core values, and lead your life from them. They will help you implement your boundaries, and say yes to the right things.
38. You are worthy of love just as you are, right here, right now.
39. You are never too old to learn a new skill or change. Today is the best day to start.
40. No one is coming to save you. Changing yourself and your life begins with you. Be different. Go first. It’s scary as heck, but worth it.

There you have it! My 40 life lessons at 40 years of age that I have learned so far! Did something resonate with you? Share with a friend or leave a comment!!

With love,

Chase your goals. Change your life.